by: kphirst
Total views: 1
Word Count: 420

Men don't make passes at girls who wear glasses - well, they didn't until eyeglasses became a fashion statement. Now people spend hundreds of dollars on designer frames. Designer frames are a status symbol. They're for others to see you can afford them - but they're not for me. I can't see them when I'm wearing them; and when I'm not wearing them, I can't find them. Instead, I buy mini magnifiers at the drug store; and I don't think it should cost more than ten dollars to be able to read their price tags. For ten dollars it's no big deal if I break them or lose them and obviously I'm not the only one who feels this way. The other night a waiter heard me say I couldn't read the menu because I'd forgotten my menu magnifiers. He appeared at the table with a box of left-behinds to choose from. Supposedly 29% of car accidents happen within five miles of home. Now "eye" know why. I also know why my trustworthy cheaters are never where I left them. They have little legs. The reason you haven't seen these legs is you never have your eyeglasses on when you look at your eyeglasses. I could solve the problem of escaping eyewear by sneaking up on a pair and putting a neck chain on them - but I'm not ready for that. To me neck chains say granny glasses as much as a pair of wire rims on the end of my nose. I don't think I'm old enough for that even if I'm old enough to know better. Instead, I tried wearing contacts. Not a good solution either. After two emergency trips to the ophthalmologist, I decided searching the house for my eyeball enhancers was better than having my eyeballs searched for contacts. Then I tried laser surgery. The good news is the surgery was successful. The bad news is 20/20 vision didn't solve my problem. I'm still losing sunglasses. Everyone loves sunglasses. Regular glasses are associated with dependency, aging and frequent complaining that the print in phones books is getting smaller. Sunglasses on the other hand - the hand with the SPF/15 tanning lotion - are associated with fun in the sun. If I had a penny - okay, a dollar - for every pair I've lost, I could clearly see myself having fun in the sun - on an exotic island.

About the Author

Knight Pierce Hirst takes humorous looks at life. Take a minute to make yourself smile at http://knightwatch.typepad.com

---

View PDF | Print View

---

Rating: Not yet rated

--Choose-- 0 1 2 3 4 5

Comments

No comments posted.

Add Comment

You do not have permission to comment. If you log in, you may be able to comment.
Next Article - 2008 Election Proving Once Again the USA is the Greatest Nation in the Entire Universe
Previous Article - Can Confusion Be Confuted?

More Related Articles In This Category

1: Is There A Recipe For Making Money?
2: Is Work A Four-Letter Word?
3: How To Get Your Man To Be A Ten Out Of Ten
4: What's Good About Good Health?
5: Haunted Airports in Hawaii!
6: Is There Humor In Politics?
7: Things To Do With Chauffeur Car Hire
8: Technical Troubleshooting at ATT Yahoo for Fun, Profit and Sheer Adventure
9: Can You Take The "I" Out Of Traffic?
10: Industrial Design Has It's Uses - Somewhere
11: How Do You Manage Home Management?
12: Does Anyone Study Studies?
13: Does Success Make You Successful?
14: What Did Your Mother Tell You?
15: What Topics Are In For Being Stressed-Out?
16: The Humble Ink Cartridge Is Often Mistaken
17: Give Me My Tooth
18: Baby Clothes Louder Than The Baby
19: Are We Acting Our Age?
20: Does Charity Really Begin At Home?
21: Do We Put The Lax In Relaxation?
22: Is Twitter For Twits?
23: Laughing Out Loud Online - The Key To Finding Hilarity In A Boring World
24: Did You Play Rich Man, Poor Man?
25: Is It Later Than You Think?

---

For WebMasters

Link This Article - HTML Code -

<a href="http://americanahost.com/articles/humor/shouldn-t-there-be-a-c-in-glasses.html" target=_blank>Shouldn't There Be A "C" In Glasses?</a>

Link This Article - BBcode -

[url=http://americanahost.com/articles/humor/shouldn-t-there-be-a-c-in-glasses.html]Shouldn't There Be A "C" In Glasses?[/url]

Copy This HTML Code To Put This Article In Your Web Site.

<h1>Shouldn't There Be A "C" In Glasses?</h1><br><br> <br><br> Men don't make passes at girls who wear glasses - well, they didn't until eyeglasses became a fashion statement. Now people spend hundreds of dollars on designer frames. Designer frames are a status symbol. They're for others to see you can afford them - but they're not for me. I can't see them when I'm wearing them; and when I'm not wearing them, I can't find them. Instead, I buy mini magnifiers at the drug store; and I don't think it should cost more than ten dollars to be able to read their price tags. For ten dollars it's no big deal if I break them or lose them and obviously I'm not the only one who feels this way. The other night a waiter heard me say I couldn't read the menu because I'd forgotten my menu magnifiers. He appeared at the table with a box of left-behinds to choose from. Supposedly 29% of car accidents happen within five miles of home. Now "eye" know why. I also know why my trustworthy cheaters are never where I left them. They have little legs. The reason you haven't seen these legs is you never have your eyeglasses on when you look at your eyeglasses. I could solve the problem of escaping eyewear by sneaking up on a pair and putting a neck chain on them - but I'm not ready for that. To me neck chains say granny glasses as much as a pair of wire rims on the end of my nose. I don't think I'm old enough for that even if I'm old enough to know better. Instead, I tried wearing contacts. Not a good solution either. After two emergency trips to the ophthalmologist, I decided searching the house for my eyeball enhancers was better than having my eyeballs searched for contacts. Then I tried laser surgery. The good news is the surgery was successful. The bad news is 20/20 vision didn't solve my problem. I'm still losing sunglasses. Everyone loves sunglasses. Regular glasses are associated with dependency, aging and frequent complaining that the print in phones books is getting smaller. Sunglasses on the other hand - the hand with the SPF/15 tanning lotion - are associated with fun in the sun. If I had a penny - okay, a dollar - for every pair I've lost, I could clearly see myself having fun in the sun - on an exotic island.<br><br> <h3>About The Author</h3> Knight Pierce Hirst takes humorous looks at life. Take a minute to make yourself smile at http://knightwatch.typepad.com<br><br> Keywords: <b>Humor, Women, Men, Glasses, Eyeglasses, Eyewear</b> <br><br>Article Source : <a href="http://americanahost.com/articles"><b>Articles Directory</b></a></br> Article URL : <a href="http://americanahost.com/articles/humor/shouldn-t-there-be-a-c-in-glasses.html" target=_blank>Shouldn't There Be A "C" In Glasses?</a></br> Article Category : <a href="http://americanahost.com/articles/humor/">Humor</a></br> Article Author : <a href="http://americanahost.com/articles/profile/kphirst-55.html">kphirst</a>

---

Article URL : Shouldn't There Be A "C" In Glasses?
Article Category : Humor
Article Author : kphirst